15 August 2009 - 10:22 pm

Nailbiting

How does so much time pass between posts on this blog? I have no idea where it all goes. But anyway, here we are again – yet another step in my attempts to chronicle the writing of the blogfic. It is still an interesting journey for me – and hopefully for my readers, too.

I have come to a difficult part of the Apocalypse Blog again, and that makes me nervous. Just like with Ben’s death, this is a section that I have had planned for a very long time. Unlike Ben’s death, I have been wavering badly about how to do it, and whether to do it at all.

There’s a large part of me that wanted to chicken out. I’m afraid to do something irrevocable to a character I’m very fond of, or something that my readers will hate me for. At the same time, I don’t want to wuss out of doing what I think will be good for the story. What I hope will be good for the story. So I’m trying to do the brave thing and see if this will work.

I just finished writing today’s post. It was more upsetting than I had anticipated – for me, I mean. It was hard for me to write – and edit – never mind poor Faith. I posted it before I could change my mind (the posts are still going up far more raw than I like, but hopefully that’s a good thing in this case). I don’t think the next few are going to be much easier!

To make myself feel better, I have updated the Testimonials page on AB with some new feedback I got through. I do love my emails!

This particular reader pointed out that the Seekers are perhaps a little too good at fighting – I’ll have to keep an eye on that. I’m going for realism, and I have tried not to do the whole ‘everyone knows how to throw a punch’ movie thing. Combat is a tricky beastie to handle. Something to work on!

Right. I need to go decompress before I try to sleep. Perhaps I’ll start making proper notes about this communal blogfic thing that I’m tossing around with some friends. Hmm.

Miles to go, better get on with it.

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6 comments

  1. Julie says:

    I wanted to note that good fighters seem perfectly reasonable to me; in your world, those who can’t fight or don’t have a good fighter to protect them are either very lucky or very dead.

    I went D: D: D: D: this morning holy shit man. DILLON NOOOO

    August 16th, 2009 at 4:58 am

  2. Mel says:

    That’s true, about the fighters. I didn’t want ’em to be useless, or constantly running away. I didn’t want it to be easy, either. It’s a balance I’m always looking at.

    Poor Dillon. Turns out that being one of the writer’s favourites doesn’t mean he’s safe.

    August 16th, 2009 at 9:26 am

  3. Nyssa says:

    Oh Melanie, I just read THE post. I *loved* Dillion, he was just like the little brother Faith never had.

    I both loved and hated the post. I know that sometimes you have to sacrifice a character for the good of the story. But I hate that it was Dillion.

    Keep up the excellent writing.

    August 16th, 2009 at 11:29 pm

  4. Mel says:

    Hi Nyssa!

    Writing this part has been heartbreaking. I’m sorry to see him go, too! I’m glad that there was a part of you that liked the post and it’s not all hate.

    Dillon won’t be forgotten. He’s a big part of who Faith is now. And we wuvs him.

    August 17th, 2009 at 8:26 am

  5. Svenja says:

    I was so sad to see Dillon go! He deserved better. 🙁 Poor Dillon. And poor Faith.

    But then, this is what makes this story so great. It’s gritty and realistic and doesn’t shy away from events like this or what happened with Ben. I really like that, even though I’ll miss Dillon and I feel really sorry for him.

    August 19th, 2009 at 12:25 am

  6. Mel says:

    Thanks for the comments, Svenja.

    It was so very tempting to shy away from something like that – hell, it upset me, never mind anyone else. 😉 But realism and grittiness is what I’m going for, and it was one of those ‘grab my courage by the throat and go for it’ moments.

    There are other reasons too. It’s possible there will be a whole blog post musing on it, because it was hard.

    Poor Dillon. I miss him already!

    August 19th, 2009 at 5:55 pm